Fun and games at the airport

Let me tell you about Kuwait airport. It’s a strange place, a unique place in fact. Since I am travelling to Bahrain most weekends from Kuwait, I have spent a significant amount of time in Kuwait airport. I have gotten to know the place quite well, and likewise, Kuwait airport seems to have got to know me.

Let’s take the visa section for example where I have to go every week upon arrival (my work visa is STILL in progress so I have to take a tourist visa). The men behind the counter are a grumpy bunch, but seem to soften as soon as they see I was born in Liverpool. And then kicks off the conversation about LFC and how they are a great club and who is your favourite player, but oh they are not doing so well this season! Yes I say to myself as I role my eyes in my head. It has become so often now that I frequent the airport that upon seeing me, one man behind the counter always exclaims ‘it’s the girl from Liverpool!’ It’s the same when entering the airport from Kuwait side, I pass them and a few will give a nod in my direction. The other hot topic of discussion whilst waiting for my visa to be issued is the fact I am a designer, some of them are genuinely interested in my field, some of them tell me Kuwait is the best place in the world for fashion, and a few of them have asked cheekily if I would like to design them some clothes sometime. I tell them straight that I design women’s clothing only.

I had a rather comical conversation with a man at the currency exchange place a few weeks ago at the airport. After exchanging the currency, I was peacefully counting my dinars when the man behind the counter knocked on the separation glass and proceeded to quiz me on where I was from:

‘Excuse me, are you from Korea?’

Ah it’s the ‘guess where I am from’ game the people from this region seem to love so much.

‘No’

‘You Japanese?’

‘No’

‘Ah, you Taiwanese?’

At this point I am tempted to give the poor guy a clue saying he is close but not the right ‘ese’. He looks puzzled.

‘Chinese, I am Chinese….and English!!!’

Still looks puzzled.

‘But you look Japanese’

‘Nope’

Still looks puzzled.

‘Well we are all human’ he says and goes back to counting his own stash of money.

I walk off, so very grateful for that revelation.

I have also built up some silent friendships at the airport. It seems I am not the only one who works in Kuwait in the week and commutes back to Bahrain on the weekend. There are a few of us in fact. We all see each other at the gate and give silent acknowledgments with slight nods and smiles to each other without ever saying a word. There is something reassuring in this as I don’t feel like the only person in the world committing to such gruelling routine.

But my experiences are not always positive as I found out last week. Upon exiting immigration on Kuwait side, the guy at the gate entering duty free took my passport, looked at it and said ‘well done, well done, you did well to get that passport’ handed it back and gave me a wink. I just chirped ‘thanks!’ and walked off before the penny dropped and I realised what he was implying (okay I may be paranoid, maybe he wasn’t implying it, but I think he was). I believe he thought I was a ‘Thai bride’ of sorts (okay not Thai but you know what I mean) and I married for my passport. He could also think I got it on the black market and it was an impressive counterfeit but the twinkle in his eye when he winked at me would suggest the former. This ignorant and very common way of thinking really annoys me, and at times, upsets me.

I had a very upsetting experience a few weeks ago where no amount of talking about Liverpool Football Club was going to help with the guys at the visa section. Without knowing it, I had exceeded the amount of times I was allowed to exit and enter with a tourist visa whilst having a work visa pending on their records. So technically, I was on two visas at the same time. I wasn’t aware of this and they refused to let me back into Kuwait. The guy behind the counter told me rather rudely that he was ‘sending’ me back to my country. It all got very heated and quite complicated so we had to call my boss at one ‘o’ clock in the morning who luckily was able to convince them to let me back in with the promise I wouldn’t exit until my visa situation was resolved.

Like I said, Kuwait airport is truly a unique place. It’s the only airport in the world where I have seen the staff smoking cigarettes and eating Burger King behind the x-ray machines. The only airport where I have had Arab women clicking their fingers at me to get out of their way. It’s the only airport I have seen female immigration staff allowed to wear drag queen style make up (but at least they smile and say hello). Kuwait airport also seems to be the place where the Arab women and men like to display their interesting combinations of clothing. Seriously, I have never seen so many women wearing Juicy Couture velour tracksuits tucked into UGG boots, with classic Louis Vuitton monogram bags and a diamante trimmed headscarf to match! And the men. Really guys? Socks with rubber ‘crocs’ shoes? In public? At the airport!? And I thought London was ‘experimental’. But there is one good thing about Kuwait airport that I love. The lounge. I can access it for free with my credit card where every Thursday night I happily gorge on all of the delicious food on offer. Well I have to look forward to something right?

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